Spatchcock Episode 2 - "Ye Are the Salt of the Earth"

The weekend is here, so it must be time for another episode of Spatchcock, the hottest new comic strip on this blog.  Live and in a brand new format today.  Well, not live...live comic strips haven't been invented yet.  Feel free to take the idea and run with it if you want.  Otherwise, here's...

Spatchcock
By DJ Stipe

Down the Spatula Hole

Salt has been around as a seasoning since long before biblical times. Have you wondered why we season our food?

Speaking of spices, one spice that kind of freaks me out is allspice.  Its name is misleading of course, because it's really one spice that comes from a dried berry.  That's not what I always thought.  When asked to hand my Mom the allspice, I can remember envisioning a factory in some hot place where children worked to empty tiny spice containers labeled with "cinnamon", "nutmeg" and the names of other spices into large vats they then mixed with giant wooden spoons so that other children - the ones with extra long arms - could scoop the mixture back into containers labeled "allspice".  Maybe it's this image or just the fact that it's trying to be too much, but I find it to be one of the more nefarious spices.  As such, I find it implorable that the Chinese restaurant up the street uses it in their egg rolls...and to excess.  I've thought about mentioning it to them, but I don't know - if that's their thing, who am I to intrude?  Just don't eat their egg rolls.  Or anything fried, because the flavor is intrusive beyond comprehension.  No, maybe one day I'll have a T-Shirt made with one of those crossed out circles encompassing the word "allspice", then go to the restaurant and hope they pick up on the hint.  That's more my style.

Until next week....thank you for your eyeballs.

- DJ